Doubt and confidence

Why seed of doubt can be planted so easily, while fire of confidence can be smothered as easily as well.

When we start doubting ourselves or doubt others, the doubt will only cause more severe problems and breakdown of relationships, as the seed keeps growing.

When our level of confidence goes down, everything seems to go awry and nothing seems to be the right thing to do, as the fire has been put off.

In life, don't let the seed of doubt be planted and be grown into a tree. Nor do you let your fire of confidence be smothered away but instead, kindle it and turn it into bonfire.
There's no one else, but you yourself that can do it. Stop the seed of doubt, keep the fire of confidence going.
It might not be easy. No, it won't be. Still, work on it. You can do it.

Dread to go home?

Why do we sometimes dread to go back home?

Won't you from time to time, feel that you just simply don't want to go home?
Because you feel that back home, you'll have to face the unpleasant memories and maybe people that make you pissed off.
You feel undervalued and keep being pinpoint at of the problems, that you just want to get away as far as possible.

And yet, there are also times that you would want to go home, as there are still those that you loved, at home, who are also waiting for you. Not waiting for you to do housework, not waiting to blame you on problems that arised, not waiting for you to make decisions or give answers. But simply just waiting for you, to be there for them. Just as simple as that.

When it's getting hard to decide between going home or not, why not take a deep breathe first. Let your emotions flow. Let go of your sadness and fear. Focus on love.

There's a quote recently saw in FB, as below

When God pushes you to the edge of difficulty
Trust Him fully
Because two things can happen
Either He'll catch you when you fall
Or He'll teach you how to fly

Love

Is love something that's so hard to chase and keep?

Love has so many forms and we can't escape from love.

And how do we maintain love?

Second is easier?

People always think that the first child you have, you may stumble now and then, as you have no experience being a parent. And when the second one comes by, everything will be easier and you will know what to do. Not to say if you have the third one and so forth.
But is it really true?
Maybe for some parents, the statement should be true. But not for me.

For me, every baby is unique, thus, may behave and react differently, and also has different needs. So, taking care of one, may not be the same as the other one. Then, how can it be easier if you have the second one or more?
The only difference is that, now you are more experienced, thus you will not be so easily be frightened of, if something unusual happens. You might be more composed, and able to think and act rationally. But, of course, you will still worry, whether the decision you made, is right or not.

Negative comment

I wondered, how do we usually react when we have negative comment thrown to us?

Usually, our first reaction will be either to defend ourselves, counter attack back or dismiss the comment. I'm sure nobody like being given negative comment on. One will surely be thinking why the other person think he/she is qualified to give negative comment to us, when he/she might not know what is the actual fact or hidden cause or what's actually happening.

But sometimes, do we really ponder upon the negative comment? Is it really merely just a snide remark or is it a constructive feedback? Sometimes we are so caught up in our own world, that we tend to ignore the comment that is hurled toward us. And yet, sometimes, the comment maybe is to remind us to improve our current situation and though it may sound sarcastic to us at that moment.

So, don't we need to digest first on the negative comment given? Whether they are just simply biased remarks or they are actually point for us to ponder and work on.
Not to say that it is easy to receive negative comment to us, but maybe we just need to brace up and analyse awhile.

How to get things done faster

How do we get things to be done faster? Now with two LO on the tow, there's no more slacking allowed. Well, want to start tackling on work stuff first, so that work stuff continues to remain to be done at working hours. But how to ensure that work stuff don't overflow the working hours?

Had come across an interesting article from Kaye Ramos, which states "When you learn to let go of things that do not work, you become the magnet of things that work". There are quite a lot of quotes she mentioned in her article as well.
Allow me to list down some points that attracts me.

"Go small to achieve more"

"For everything you have missed, you have gained something else; for everything you gain, you lose something else" - Ralph Waldo Emerson

"Success requires that you follow the 80/20 Principle, but you don't have to stop there. Go even smaller by finding the vital few of the vital few. Start with as large of a list as you want, but develop a mindset that you will whittle your way from there to the critical few and not stop until you end with the essential one." - Gary Keller

"If others are sleeping, that's when you wake up and learn the game. If others are whining, that's when you step up and train. If others are giving up, that's when you press on and stick to the game. Discipline will be your greatest partner toward success."

"Pain is part and parcel of the deal. It's not a question of whether you will hurt, or how much you will hurt; it's a question of what you will do, and how well you will do it while pain has a wanton way with you." - Daniel Brown

"You don't need to overwhelm yourself with many choices by being jack-of-all-trades. You will indeed master nothing."

"If you give up the clutter that impedes your growth, you will eventually see the person you can become."

The light in your eyes

Was wondering what's so nice about this drama. Had caught the first episode on TV but found it to be an average show, one that you don't find it pity to give a miss. Then on and off, had a glimpse of the show. And out of curiosity, read through the last two episodes.

Through wiki, found that it's actually quite a recent drama, just on air early this year. And this drama is actually well-liked as it shown the daily life struggle. Couldn't help shedding tears when read through the finale.
Here I shared the final message of the show, as recapped in dramabeans.

<Quote>

My life was filled by misfortune but there were happy moments too.

They say that life is nothing but a mere dream but I was still grateful for mine. The cold, brisk air at dawn, the sweet breeze right before flowers start to bloom, and the scent of sunset that fills the air at sundown. Every single day was dazzlingly beautiful.

Even if you’re struggling right now, everyone alive has the right to enjoy all this. Even if one ordinary day is followed by another ordinary day, life is still worth living. Don’t waste the present regretting the past and worrying about the future. Live this day beautifully with light in your eyes. You deserve it.

To all of you who were a mom, a sister, a daughter, and yourself.

<Unquote>

I like the part saying that, even if you are struggling in your life, you should enjoy it; even if life is ordinary, it is still worth living for.

Don't you agree? 

Love yourself first

Just watched an episode of China's reality show "Super Diva" a.k.a "ma ma mi a".
The stories from the mothers are all interesting. But one of the messages that linger on my mind is "love yourself first, then only you can love your other half".

I'm sure most of all, had come across with that statement now and then. But how many of us had truly lived that way. Sometimes, we tend to forget or just put it aside. We are prone to having others to love us first, before we love ourselves. The need and hunger to be loved, seems to be greater. But if everyone expect the same, then there will be no one loving others, nor there be anyone loving us, as all are waiting for love.

Love yourself.
Do things for yourself. Once you are loved, you'll realizes that you want to love others, too. If this goes in a cycle, then everyone will be loved. Isn't it?

Inertia

Interesting word of the day - "Inertia".
It's not a new word, and we should have come across this word in our Physics study.
In Physics, Inertia means a property of matter by which it continues in its existing state of rest or uniform motion in a straight line, unless that state is changed by an external force.
In common layman word, Inertia means a tendency to do nothing or to remain unchanged.

Questions.
Should we be the state of Inertia?
If we are in the state of Inertia, when and how are we going to get out of this state.
Do we, from time to time, get back into the state of Inertia?

It seems comfortable to be in the state of Inertia. You don't need to do anything extra, you don't need to worry about anything new, and everything remain the same as they are.
But at the same time, isn't it scary as well? Everyone and everything is moving along or changing from time to time, and you are the only one staying behind.
Then only you realize that there's gap between you and the others. When the gap is small, it seems not to be an issue at all, but when the gap gets bigger, you'll be wondering why others seem to be living in a different world and you can't seem understand or engage with them.

So, are you in the state of Inertia now?
Are you the kind of person that need others to give you a nudge, in order for you to accept something new, or to explore something new?

We are not living in the world of dinosaurs. And since mankind exists, mankind had not stop learning and exploring until now, where we are all connected with just a tap of finger.
So, even if we want to stay in the state of Inertia, we can't avoid not to know what's going on with the outside world. And since we are to know what's going on, we can't afford to stay in the state of Inertia forever. We cannot stop learning, and once learnt, we cannot stop practicing, and once practised, we are no longer the same.

Stack up your pillow high, and think about it. Do you really want to stay in the state of Inertia? Are you sure you can remain in the state of Inertia forever?

LO: Two is a company

So fast that two years have passed by. And here we are again, to recount how the last nine months have gone by.
It's unbelievable, that all these while, struggling with the day to day tasks, constant on and off bickerings and dissatisfaction, and moments of almost breaking down, we are actually welcoming another LO into our lives.
Still I'm glad and grateful for it, on the arrival of this LO. Though, I guess, my moments of breaking down might be increasing from now on. Which I hope not (crossing my fingers).

Week 5-8, started to feel uncomfortable, which seems to be the right signal but still wished to wait until week 7 to get the official confirmation from gynae. Don't want to get hope high, then down again the very next day. And this round also had toothache again, jeez. Can't escape from the extraction this time.
Week 9-13, nausea feeling is here, well, seems to be normal like the previous one. But an unexpected vomiting happened after dinner, one day. Gosh, don't tell me I'm going to have vomiting throughout the semester. Luckily it doesn't last long and appetite is back again.
Week 14-18, can start to feel the bump getting firmer. Thirst for water gets more and more.
Week 19-22, work somehow get busier causing not much appetite to eat more, and it's more like eating just for the sake of meal not because of hunger. It's getting harder to fall back asleep when awoke at night. And it's the time when movements can be detected vaguely.
Week 23-26, sore back is back again. Gosh, unexpectedly pull the back muscle when kneeling down, but luckily pain went away within a week. Constipation issue is starting again.
Week 27-30, BB head already turn downwards. That's good. Seems to ready to meet the world, though stil counting down for another 10 weeks or lesser.
Week 31-35, BB movements seems to be digging inwards and low, which seems unusual. After checkup, only realised that BB head had turn upwards, breech position.
Week 36-39, had a fall on both knees while trying to carry DD, luckily not hurting the bump but poor DD got hurt instead. Had a very restless and tired night when BB suddenly had huge movements. What was amazing, is that BB had actually turn itself back downwards. Whew, no need to worry about ECV.
BB head already in pelvis area in end of week 39, so it's just a matter of days on when he's ready. Even had false contractions that cause false alarms, twice, which doesn't last long, too.
Week 40, finally BB is ready to meet us, even though he's overdue by 7 days based calc EDD and by 4 days if based on gynae EDD. Still it's a shorter wait at labour room this round, though the pain is no lesser.

How will I be in another 2 years time? I'm not sure. But this coming 2 years, hopefully, I'll survive better, and survive intentionally.
Till then.